Old dogs...

I looked out the window at one point today to see my dog lying flat on its back with one hind leg in the air, in the typical "playing dead" pose she sometimes does if she's been rolling about on her back.

I thought, "Haha, eejit," then looked twice to convince myself she was actually breathing, because I'd never seen her play dead with that kind of focus before.

Looked over, and saw a sparrow hopping about quite unworriedly by her head, apparently quite convinced that the big brown thing beside it wasn't going to move. Once it had moved away slightly, she actually got up and stalked it a bit - honestly never seen her acting so stealthy... colour me surprised; I had her down as being sweet but a bit thick.


Dr Seuss and other quotes

Me: It's around somewhere, just a different somewhere.

Gerard: Sounds like Dr Seuss.

Me: No, that would be along the lines of "I cannot find it here nor there/ I cannot find it anywhere."

Gerard: "It is not here, it is not there/ Did you check your underwear?"
[Note: I was looking for my wallet...]

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[After we had been eating a few minutes]
Gerard: Ah, Gerald! You eejit!

[Gerald (Shobi) looks bemused]

Gerard: How did you end up eating with that fork? That's the one we use for dog food.

[Shobi looks suspicious; Gerard's expression doesn't change]

Gerard: You eejit. I'll get you another one, man.

[He gets up from the table. Silence. Shobi's expression shows growing discomfort as he quietly regards the fork]

Shobi: Really?

[pause]

Gerard: No.

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Gerard: Is Tara [our dog] spayed?

Me: Yes. Why?

Gerard: Well, because [name & address supplied] is coming to the party...

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Shobi: ENTER THE VAGINA! ENTER THE VAGINA OF WARRRRRRRRR!!

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[Shobi again: Gerard handed my ma his mobile with Shobi on speakerphone, who proceeded to talk to her in a South-American-drug-dealer voice for about 5 minutes before she realised who it was.]

Shobi: [dangerous voice]"This is the Mongoose."

Ma: "What??"

Shobi: "The MONGOOSE."

Ma: "No, who is this?"

Shobi: "You dare to ask the Mongoose of his name?"

Ma: "..."

Shobi: "The Mongoose stalks the tree at dawn."

["Mongoose" waits for appropriate response]
[mother makes wtf noises]

Shobi: "ARGHHHHH... who I talk to? I tire."

Ma: "Heyyyy. The screen [on Gerard's mobile] says Gerald..."

Shobi: "..."

Shobi: "How dare you! [hispanic muttering]"

Ma: "Right... Gerard's not allowed to play with you anymore..."

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Granny: Sarah, is this your blouse?

Gerard: Big girl's blouse? Oh, Gerald must have left that behind...

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[So the Cam types don't feel left out... MSN quotes headed for the Book:]

Cellar E: yeah, i seen all the sizes, can't remember all the names though.

Bahamut!: hairdressers know nothing, rahhhhh!!!! they should go back to Iceland where they came from
Bahamut!: feckin Icelandics
Bahamut!: wait, i was meant to shout at hairdressers

Richard Manns: Cardigans can be a turn-on in certain circles anyway...

Richard Manns: "Methane-filled prophylactics fill college at Maynooth"
Bailey: sub-heading: "Junior priests believed to have SWLed"

Cellar E: "Tight is pleasurable... this is tighter..."

Bailey: Anything you need to tell me?
Richard Manns: Yes.
Richard Manns: Milk.

Richard Manns: You've been added to my jokes circulation list whether you like it or not - :)
Bahamut!: thanks
Bahamut!: this is a great achievement in my life, that will not be looked over when i win my first grammy award

Bahamut!: ok, on my way to shoot Richard as we speak

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That's all for now. ;)