My neighbours left their child-sized (about 3-4 foot diameter) inflatable paddling pool outside.
My thoughts for how to actively make the most of this situation are as follows:
-----
1. Fill with water. Obtain multiple Barbie and Action Man dolls and arrange in innocent pool party positions for future discovery.
2. Fill with Basics jelly, leave for discovery.
3. Fill with vodka. Invite friends.
4. Remove. Leave ransom note asking for cheese.
5. Strap to back. Go to pub. Refuse to use any words other than "Squirtle, squirtle!" in conversation.
6. Like #1, but leave dolls in significantly less innocent postions.
7. Like #6, but using only Action Man figures.
8. Giant. Frisbee.
9. Build small boat from cardboard. Place inside. Await children's reappearance while dressed in full pirate regalia.
10. Fill with scraps of tinfoil/ an unattended "full" rubbish bag. This is the practical route to achieving the real goal, i.e. turn pool into rave club for local magpies.
11. Buy several 15-packs of eggs. Empty into pool. Possibly scramble with electric whisk. If obnoxious music is added to the scene, this may also accomplish the ultimate goal of #10.
12. Surround with "No Diving" or, alternatively, "Pool Closed" signs.
13. Cut pineapple in half. Place in pool along with a yellow sponge and a garden snail.
14. Fill with odd socks and potting soil. That'll confuse the feckers.
-----
I'm sure this isn't all that could be done. More thought required.
3 comments:
I bet you never tried any of them, such a shame.
Please come in on Monday as a squirtle.
"14. Fill with odd socks and potting soil. That'll confuse the feckers."
Yes, because "the snail, pineapple and sponge" was clear as glass... :P
Richard: I bet the children would get it without prompting.
Megan: Squirtle squirt? Squirtle, squirtle - squirtle squirr.
Post a Comment